So this weekend, I ticked another item off my bucket list – Brazilian Wax .
Just the very thought of it had sent shivers down my spine. I anticipated excruciating pain, and had in fact thought an ambulance might be required to transport me out of the Spa!
In preparation for this, I took extra strength pain relievers before I left home. I kept asking myself, “who sent you?” Who’s looking anyway? Who exactly is going to benefit from your…errrm clean, baby soft coochie…..! That’s for me to know and you to wonder. 😉
Anyhow, I had a self-love date with my girls, so off to the Spa we went. Some opted for a massage, others for facials but I stuck to my guns – Brazilian Wax for me please!
We took pictures before we all had our treatments, the thinking being that we (I) might not be in the right frame of mind to smile for pictures after my experience! And you know I like to preen!
So!! How was the experience?
Attending to me was a lovely Filipino lady. I got starkers and laid face down on the table as directed. She peered into my butt and exclaimed “Oh! A lot of hair”! In my defense, I said, yes, I have never done this before! I mean, who shaves their butt hairs on their own??🤷🏽♀️
She applied about 3 different lotions, one of which I imagined must be some sort of anaesthesia (!); and then a powder. I suppose to prep the area for assault. Then she proceeded to put hot wax in my nether regions! Thank goodness I had not done a poo that day! And then she put plaster over it and yanked! Ouch!!!! Painful? Yes, but to be honest, less painful than I had expected. On a scale of 1-10, I would say 8. I had expected 12. She went in deep…eeeewww….! At some point, she asked for my assistance in keeping my butt cheeks apart… double eewww! The most ungraceful thing ever! Was not feeling like a chic at all!
That done, she asked me to flip over. I complied, fully expecting that this was where the real pain would begin. I lay down, knees apart, feet together, my pubes displayed in all its glory. As I said before, it was my first visit, so it required a trim before the actual waxing began.
Then she stared. Extremely professional lady. Hot wax, plaster, yank! Repeat! Ouch! Ouch!! Ouch!! I did yell Ooohhh! Aaahhhh! Not ye pa or mo gbe o! That would mean the pain must have been bearable.
When the ooohs came in quick succession, the lady would blow gently on the area! She did say I was a “very strong lady” as a number of her clients cry.
Again, she went deep. Deep deep to places only my gynaecologist has ever been…well, in a non-sexual way! I thought the deeper, the more tender, thus the more painful. But it was bearable pain. I do not know if this means I have a high pain threshold, but I sha did not die. Nor did I almost die.
At the end of it, I asked for a mirror. It was completely clean, even if it looked a little raw. I felt like a freshly plucked chicken! I imagine oyinbo skin would be red.
All in all, an interesting experience. No regrets. What did I learn? Would I do this again?
1. There is hair in some very internal parts I never knew about! Yup, she got there!
2. For the specialist, it was just another day in the office, but I do not want to be a Brazilian Wax specialist when I grow up!
3. A clean coochie at sub-50 feels unnatural. I think I will stick to a close trim. May change my mind if I start to see white hairs there sha!
4. It is an extremely invasive process. If a visit to the gynaecologist makes you feel uncomfortable then you cannot even consider this. They look and touch EVERYWHERE.
Why not build your bucket list today!
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